Que Ngoai

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Chiều chiều ra đứng ngõ sau
Trông về quê Ngoại ruột đau chín chiều.

Sinh ra và lớn lên tại thành phố Sài Gòn, tôi chưa bao giờ từng được về thăm quê Ngoại Tân An ở Long An, một tỉnh nông nghiệp miền Nam Việt Nam thuộc vùng đồng bằng sông Cửu Long.

Nhưng, hình ảnh của những cánh đồng lúa phì nhiêu, vườn cây ăn trái xum xuê và con đường làng đất bụi đã in sâu vào trong tiềm thức. Mỗi khi hồi tưởng lại những hình ảnh trên thì nó đem lại cho tôi một cảm giác rất gần gũi và thân thương.

Có một lần, má tôi và tôi được mời về thăm quê mẹ của một người quen ở Mỹ Tho thuộc tỉnh Tiền Giang. Đi xe thồ, hái vú sữa và tắm mương là những kỷ niệm đẹp của một ngày dã ngọai. Về đến nhà, tôi luôn khao khát là một ngày nào đó tôi sẽ có dịp sống một cuộc sống êm đềm trong một không gian yên tịnh nơi đồng quê.

Trở lại với cuộc sống hiện tại giữa lòng thành phố Sài Gòn ồn ào và náo nhiệt lúc bấy giờ, tôi chỉ biết được quê Ngoại qua những câu chuyện hồi xửa hồi xưa mà ngoại tôi thường kể. Nào là chuyện ngoại đi gánh gạo bán lúc trời còn tờ mờ sáng, chuyện con ma vú dài lúc về đêm, vân vân và vân vân. Và giờ đây theo lời kể lại của má tôi, tôi được biết thêm là nhà của gia đình ngoại khi xưa ở gần cầu Vàm…

Vỏn vẹn bấy nhiêu vốn liếng ít ỏi của sự hiểu biết về quê Ngoại, tôi thật sự trân quý những gì mà mình tìm hiểu được. Và tôi ghi lại đây cho các cháu tôi nay được sinh ra và lớn lên tại Hợp Chủng Quốc Hoa Kỳ và mong muốn các cháu của tôi biết đến một nơi mà khi các cháu lớn lên các cháu có thể trở về thăm lại cội nguồn.


Writer’s Notes
After years of training to dream, think, speak and write all in English, getting back to write things in Vietnamese presents a bit of a challenge because it has been a while since I wrote in my own native language. “Que Ngoai” is the first piece of writing on Happinest Daily which is deemed appropriate to be written in Vietnamese.

Rather than doing a direct translation from English to Vietnamese, I kept the originality of the writing by bringing about my thoughts in Vietnamese instead of in English. As for the English version, I wrote it separately, yet still keeping most main ideas. As a result, it turns out to be a slight variation from the original that serves as a rough translation for the Vietnamese counterpart.

Peaceful Notre-Dame

Tượng Nữ Vương Hòa Bình
tại
Vương Cung Thánh Đường Chánh Tòa Đức Bà Sài Gòn

Peaceful Notre-Dame statue at Saigon's Notre-Dame Cathedral
(Photo by Mei)

Even though I’m not being able to recall the exact date, I remember that summer day in August well. It was damp and cloudy. My camera refused to take the picture due to low light and off focus problems. It was then that I prayed really hard to the Peaceful Notre-Dame asking her for allowing me to take the photo.

In the end, the camera shuttle finally went off and the above picture is the result of how it turned out. Surprisingly beautiful, isn’t it?

At first, I have thought of presenting the edited black and white version of the Peaceful Notre-Dame statue picture for simplicity with a sense of nostalgia. But, I have decided to present the original instead. Although the sky was not as clear blue, the rawness of dark gray clouds covered blue sky seemed to be more fitting.

As violence and the injustices occur daily around the world, the hope for peace seems to be fading away. One would be living in despair. Yet, behind those dark gray clouds of the moment is the blue-colored sky of peaceful hope. Thus, let’s pray for the blessing of peace for the upcoming year and many years to come!

I Believe

Whenever Brodard bakery starts to put up their seasonal display of decorative Yule log-shaped cakes, it is Christmas time!

Funny, but that is how I would recall the start of the Christmas holiday season from my childhood memories.

Every year, my dad would take me to a shoe store located on (uprising) Dong Khoi Street, better known as (freedom) Tu Do Street, to pick out a new pair of leather sandal in replacing for the old one of mine that was already worn out from the previous year. With the soles were all eaten up, the old pair looked like a pair of razor blades that are sharp enough to cut through just anything. Thus, I was very happy to try on my new sandal, but not to wear them right away…

After our visit to the shoe store, my dad and I used to take a stroll through the streets of Saigon for "sightseeing" of Christmas decorations on display at local shops, department stores, high rise hotels, fancy restaurants and bars. Many of them had Christmas trees decking the main hall completed with colorful ornaments and blinking lights. As for the rest, the more popular, alternative choice for decorations was star-shaped lanterns. At the Saigon’s Notre-Dame Cathedral, it was there where one can find the biggest and brightest star among them all.

As always, on our way to the cathedral, I often asked my dad to stop over at a branch of Brodard bakery located across from the City Theatre so I could take a look in admiring bánh, Vietnamese for cake, Bûche through the glass store display windows. Since Christmas is more often be referred as Noël in Viet Nam, the Yule log Christmas cake is better known as Bûche de Noël.

On surrounding perimeter of the Notre-Dame Cathedral and the near by Central Post Office, lining up one after another were street shop after street shop busy selling Christmas cards, ornaments and, of course, star-shaped lanterns. Adding to the festive scene of the holiday season were groups of young and old, Christians and non-Christians gathered at the cathedral’s front courtyard enjoying casual conversation with one another.

At the foot of the Peaceful Notre-Dame statue, children were running around the flower garden. Holding in their hands was the big round red-colored balloon tied to a long stick that the balloon stands had it for sell just for the occasion. Others were trying on those pointy red paper hats their parents bought for them. And, pictures were taken by street-side photographers as memories got frozen in frames.

Having been taken inside the cathedral to observe the nativity scene, my dad walked me home leaving behind the busy streets to the Saigon's nightlife as traffics getting heavier.

* * *

Nowadays, things must have changed as I have learned that we now have Santa Clause riding motorbike to deliver Christmas gifts to children at home for a small fee.

With less than 10 percents of Viet Nam's total population is Catholic, it is much less for a Vietnamese family to celebrate traditional Christmas and it is much less for Vietnamese parents to be Santa Clause in bringing out that twinkle in the eyes of their children.

As Christmas services become commercialized, the magical moment has lost its special meaning. Once being a child, I really appreciated what my parents did for me. On this Christmas, I wish that those children would have the same magical experience as I once had.

Every year, I felt in awe of what happened before my eyes on Christmas morning. Santa did not only leave gifts, he even decorated the surrounding!

Having carefully placed at the foot of the bed my new pair of leather sandal on the night before Christmas, I was thankful for the unexpected gifts that Santa had left behind on Christmas Day. Whether it was a wooden truck hauling ton of candies or a lady bug imprinted clear plastic purse filled with chocolates, the lovingly thought of someone who cares was much more important than the material good themselves.

Although all presents did eventually stop after the year I suddenly woke up one night and saw my parents franticly decorated the place, the present of magical experience that they gave was long lasting than that.

Even now, I still believe in Santa Clause!

Flowers of My Life

Now and then
Think of you and me
Forever friends forever will be
Time is changin'
But nothing's to be blamed
Cos our heart forever sing

- (Half Rap) Chorus lyrics from the song Friendship found
in Leo Ku's compilation album titled Having You On This Day

Looking back on life, friends did come and go. Since there were no formal "hellos", there were no definite "goodbyes." Yet, there were unspoken promises to keep in touch. But, did anyone really?

When meeting new friends, I often reflect about old ones, wondering how they are and what they are up to. How are you, old friends? Do you still remember me?

There are two shoeboxes filled with hand written letters from friends that I have kept over the years. One even goes as far back as elementary school days. Whenever I place in a new letter, I start to read a few of the old ones.

The presence of friends is like a breath of spring bringing blooms of happiness, an early summer sun brightening the day, an autumn night's wind blowing away all woes and lastingly festive winter time bringing about joy. Their presence is for a purpose. They are there for me. And, I’m there with them.

As a novice gardener, I did learn that annuals need to be re-planting every year while perennials come back years after years. Yet, they both require fertilizing, watering and especially, caring.

Here, in the Northeast, the weather is changing through out the year. Pleasantly springtime soon leads to a glaringly hot summer. Just as colorful autumn leaves fall off the trees, the harshly cold winter begins. Plants need to be protected to cope with whatever nature brings.

As early as autumn, flowering buds of some trees already are measurable in size. It is always a thrill to see spring bulbs coming up through the ground dusting with snow falling late in winter. Noticing them, one would picture a vibrant palette of flowers and greens that is not necessarily seen only in spring and summer.

My friends are flowers of my life. They are in my heart and I do think in caring for them. I thank them for being there, even only for a brief moment.

How do we keep in touch? Truthfully, it might not be possible in the today world. But, it’s still worth trying to do whatever we can. Or else, let’s take a little time in our day to think of each other.


*Photo courtesy of Microsoft Office Online
(Re-edited by Mei using Picasa2 and Microsoft Office Picture Manager)

Foggy Morning

Mù sương giăng giăng phố
Mưa nhẹ lất phất bay
Nỗi lòng người viễn xứ
Thương về mái nhà xưa.

Writer’s Notes
This is another piece of poetry that I had written in my native Vietnamese language. The poem depicts one morning in autumn. As I drove myself to work under the drizzling rain, the scenery stirred up an old feeling of homesick.

Wandering Way

Đường đời dài lắm nẻo đi
Hành trang đã xếp đi đâu phương nào
Mắt nhìn có thấu màn đêm
Ánh trăng chiếu sáng rọi soi con đường.

Writer’s Notes
Letting alone the fact that I received no formal training in writing poetry, I’m scared of having to write one. Unskilled and inexperience, I never thought that I would ever record poems on paper and not even attempt to publish them.

Yet, verses start to pop up in head every once in a while. For the sake of curiosity, I wrote bits and pieces down. And, here they are, finding their way into my blog.

That said, I wrote this particular poem around summertime of this year. It was written in Vietnamese of course. After having much trouble in finding an appropriate Vietnamese title for it, I decided to name it “Wandering Way” in English instead.

Roughly translated, it literally means that life is a crossroad and people are travelers. Under the darkness of the night, one would rely on the moonlight to guide the way.

This poem carries a simple message. The point to get across is that although we walk on a different path of life, we all can seek for guidance and strength from our faith in our most despair time.

One Summer Day

Late in May, the sun rises quite early. By 5:55 AM, it’s already a bright red orange ball hovering over the young wheat field. As I stepped on the break pedal bringing my car to a halt at the stop sign, I felt in awe of the picturesque morning being painted ahead.

Was I blinded by the sunlight or awakened by the beautiful scenery?
Isn’t it strange that we rarely stop and see?

summer'07

Ngoai

When I first learned about a Microsoft media tool called Photo Story 3, I immediately scanned a number of photos from the family’s photo albums and put together my first project: “Ngoai”, literally translated as “Grandma.”

The summer wind, came blowin'in
- from across the sea

- Lyrics from a 1965 song's Summer Wind

My Grandmother This picture was taken when she was on vacation at Vung Tau.

Memories that are FOREVER cherished.

Remembering...

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ The way she was.
~ ~ ~ ~ The love she gave.
~ ~ The joy she had with her beautiful SMILE :)

Then & Evermore...

Thanks!
Love Always,

Background Music:
Love Theme 01:47
{an instrumental track from Leon Lai's If I Can See You Again album}

NOTE:
Photo video clips will not be made available online. Only selected stills are. (Check out the below stills slideshow)

Stills Slideshow:

Production Note:
Because my grandmother had passed away the year before, it was hard to let her go.

It took me almost two years to learn that my grandmother is still with us. She had passed on us her heritage, wisdom and guidance that we now proudly possess.

*Vung Tau (Vietnamese: Vũng Tàu) is well-known for its long stretch of beaches located approximately 70 miles away from Ho Chi Minh City.

Happinest

“Cá biết nguồn về thăm nghĩa cội.
Chim dầu xa tổ nhớ ơn cây.”

Happinest - Tổ Ấm
Photo by Mei

To my extended family, thank you for being a part of my life. I love you all. And I believe that if we all be able to give and forgive, we will find the utmost happiness in life.

Writer's Notes
This picture was taken in my backyard back in mid-August of 2006, right after I was back from my trip to Viet Nam. The photo helps me to reflect on the purpose of my trip and realize the blessing of having a family to come back to.

Given name "Happinest" is the concatenation of the word “happy” and the word “nest”. In its concatenate form, it is spelled and pronounced like the word “happiness”, which truly describes my feeling at the time when I looked deeply at the picture to find myself surrounded by the love, support and understanding from everyone of my extended family.

Tree Root, Water Source

Cây có gốc, nước có nguồn

Tree
木Mộc
Root
本Bổn
Water
水Thủy
Source
源Nguyên

(Source: Microsoft Office Online Photos)

Our Journey

H O M E

回家summer’06

我的 My Story 故事
Born in Saigon, Viet Nam. I grew up in an old two stories house, number 31 on Nguyen Cong Tru street, with my maternal grandparent, parent and five orphaned cousins whom I affectionately called brothers and sisters.

My parent started out as small scale sellers on the streets of Sai Gon peddling goods including fresh fruits, expensive liquors, second-hand navigational instruments and any wares or merchandise that would generate profits for them to make a living. As peddlers, they met, fell in love and got married. Together, they built a family that I was blessed to be born into.

Struggled from job to job, employed then unemployed, my father managed to do bookkeeping for a privately owned tire manufacturer, tutor English for local co-op employees and work as an English translator for various import and export companies.

Though having a steadier secretarial employment at a privately owned door manufacturer, my mother had to pedaling her bicycle miles from home to get to her workplace. Despite the hardship of life, they worked hard to feed the family.

Growing up, I spent the great amount of my time focusing on school with the hope for a better life; or, at least that was what the elders had to advise. At the time, the future was full of uncertainties. Yet, I took up the opportunity to do well in school. To me, it was a blessing to be schooled and fed in comparison to the less fortunate ones.

As much as I enjoyed studying, I loved tagging along with my brothers, whether it was to cheer them on in a street soccer game or to participate with them in a game of throwing plastic figurines or shooting marbles.

Together with my sisters, I learned the arts, although I have to admit that I was neither good at them nor as skilled as my sisters were.

Perhaps, the most memorable after school activity was to accompany my grandma in collecting the discarded coconut husks at the Cho Cu Market. Those coconut husks were later dried under the sun. Once dried, they were used in place of woods and charcoals for cooking.

Living in lacking of material things, I was not missed out the passing of my grandparent's heritage, wisdom and guidance. That was not to mention the loving care of my parent and the brotherly friendship from my brothers and sisters. There were the experiences of hardships, but they had never been a burden.

Looking back, those were the happy time of my life and I did enjoy every moment of it.

*Sai Gon (Vietnamese: Sài Gòn) is well-known by Vietnamese for Ho Chi Minh City.
**Old Market (Vietnamese: Chợ Củ) is a popular Vietnamese open street market located off Ham Nghi Street in District 1, Sai Gon, Viet Nam.

Summer Rain
七月的雨
Tháng 7 Trời Mưa

"See the rain.
See the rain fall down.
Life is full of memories.
We won’t let them wash away."

- Chorus lyrics from Jacky Cheung's Release Myself album

To keep up with the fast-paced of my ever so busy American life, I often forget to stop and breathe in order to get in touch with my inner self and to recognize the present of the beautiful surrounding nature and the loved ones.

In the summer of 2006, I went on a trip to get reacquaint with my roots after 14 years, 6 months and 7 days of leaving my motherland. I had returned to the familiar places to see the familiar faces of those whom I grew up with for early half of my life.

夢想 Dream Comes True 成真
“Our Journey HOME” photo story is a product resulting from my long love affair with stage, film and music.

Ever since I was young, stage plays and musicals are a part of my life. Public television and radio were the only two sources at the time. My family was so poor then. We could not afford tickets for live performances playing nightly at various local theaters in the city.

Not until my family and I immigrated to the States in the winter of 1992, I had given the opportunity to get acquainted and experience different culture. Through the new journey, I learned to appreciate and embrace Broadway stage plays and musicals, classic and contemporary Hollywood movies and the American music.

At the same time, I did not forget to get in touch with my Asian roots. I found my way back by learning the languages and studying the culture diversity among Asian countries.

Being a Vietnamese of Chinese heritage living in the States gives me the best of both worlds, East and West. I’m proud of who I am.

I do believe that everyone is given the chance to make any dreams come true.

oOo

Going Back Home
回家

“leaving is for coming back”

- A song's title from Chet Lam's travelogue 1 album

For years, I yearned to wake up in the morning upon hearing the rhythmic broom sweeping on the pavement and the cracking sound of burning coals. Ah, that was how the street side café and breakfast shopkeepers started the day in preparation for a busy selling day, or so they hope.

Although the scenery had now changed and the people got older, it is still the same place, the same skies and pretty much the same life.

My childhood home is now a representative office for an Australian company. Despite getting a major facelift, the house is undeniable for its original structure. Hidden in every inch are the crying, the laughter and the running footsteps of my cousins and me.

Off to the front of the house, the sidewalk breakfast and coffee shops still stand. Near by office workers continue to enjoy meals and beverages served by the same families who had been running the shops for years.

I had left, and then came back.

After nearly 15 years, life goes on.

全心 Wholeheartedly Thank You 多謝
First and forth most, I give thanks for being blessed with a wonderful family.

With all respects, I thank my parent for their unconditional love, continuous support and indispensable guidance keeping me staying on the right track.

Through out the development of this project, thank you for being there, listening to all of my ramblings and enduring each and every video segment reviewing sessions. Yet, you offered valuable advises to better my work. With your approval, I don’t think that I’m crazy after all. Or, do I still?

To my very best cousins, "Cò Chiên" and "Vân Chỉ", thank you for your humor, love and care. Thanks for three memorable weeks. I had a lot of fun driving motorbike with you in those rainy days. That memory and much more will always be cherished. I miss you both.

To my good friend, Thúy Vinh, thank you for being there in the time of need. You went out of your way to find two of the most important people in my life back one-by-one. I’m forever grateful to you.

Last, but not least, to my extended family, this is the gift of love from me to you. Thank you for being a part of my life. I love you all. And I believe that if we all be able to give and forgive, we will find the utmost happiness in life.

oOo

Conceived & Produced By Mei Nguyen
6B Production

The Way Home